Law & Order: Fairy Tale Unit Character Breakdown LEADS: These characters have many lines and will be required to memorize large amounts of the script. Each character requires excellent comic timing. H.D. - (AKA Humpty Dumpty, but not “revealed” until late in the script) (Male) A hardened Detective – Seen it all and lived to tell the fairy tales. H.D. has his arm in a sling, a bandage wrapped around his head, maybe some other bandages and some bruises. Partner to Cindy. CINDY - (AKA Cinderella) (Female) A detective as tough as nails with a heart of gold has kept Cindy a good partner for H.D.. On top of that, she’s an excellent detective. Although not too sweet, she is nonetheless a calming influence on H.D. STILTSKIN - (AKA Rumplestiltskin) (Male or Female) Executive District Attorney responsible for seeing that justice is done in Fairy Tale. S/He’s flashy, overly confident, and willing to see that every Fairy Tale creature has justice on their side. MERM - (AKA Ariel - that Little Mermaid) (Female) Assistant District Attorney who works with STILTSKIN. Bright, capable, and not nearly as flashy as Stiltskin. She is still an attorney who knows how to make sure that Fairy Tale is kept safe. MERM has a little trouble walking around, stabilizing herself with a cane. She wears a large seashell brooch and has sunscreen on her nose. WOLF - (AKA Big Bad Wolf) (Male) Must wear various pieces of fake fur creating a look of being hairy, but will not necessarily wear a wolf mask. Claims innocence and being misunderstood. Could look big and menacing, but is a sensitive soul.
SECONDARY CHARACTERS: These characters play an integral role in the plot and have quite a few lines and at least one or more scenes. Good comic timing is needed. ZELLE - (AKA RapunZELLE) (Female) ZELLE is a Crime Scene Investigator. She already analyzing the crime scene. Her hair is styled in a tall beehive. THREE PIGS - Pig 1, Pig 2 and Pig 3 (Female or Male) PIG 1 - PIG 1 speaks with a stereotypical Brooklyn accent. Built straw house that has been blown down. PIG 2 - PIG 2 speaks with a stereotypical Southern accent. Built stick house that has been blown down. PIG 3 - PIG 3 speaks with a stereotypical highfalutin British accent, and maybe has a pipe in his mouth. He owns a brick condo. JACK and JILLIAN - (Male and Female respectively) Joggers who have been possible eyewitnesses to the crimes being investigated. HANSEL and GRETEL - (Male and Female respectively) HANSEL and GRETEL are dressed like normal teenagers, except for a few German accessories – a German hat and short pants (lederhosen). They both speak with a stereotypical German accent. They may have been eyewitnesses to the crimes being investigated. UGLY D - (AKA Ugly Duckling) (Female) UGLY D is a CSI on the scene, investigating. She’s smart and gorgeous, but wears nerdy glasses and a ponytail. (Think Kristen Kringle from “Gotham.”) PINOCCHIO - (preferably Male, but could be Female) PINOCCHIO is a normal-looking guy/gal, except for the outrageously long nose. The longer the nose, the better. On the nose is a white bandage. An eyewitness that has difficulty telling the truth, even if it hurts not to. GOLD - (AKA Goldilocks) (preferably Female, but could be Male) GOLD is a detective. She has very blonde hair. Smart, but not quite the caliber of detective as H.D. and Cindy.
CAPTAIN - (AKA Captain Hook) (preferably Female, but could be Male) CAPTAIN is H.D. and Cindy’s boss. S/He has a hook for a hand. She seems to have some issues dealing with the stress. She speaks extremely quickly and to the point. DOC and HAPPY of the SEVEN DWARFS - (Yes, those 7 Dwarfs.) (Female or Male) DOC and HAPPY are two of the seven dwarfs who have the most lines. All SEVEN DWARFS wear basketball jerseys. They are the SEVEN DWARFS – though they aren’t necessarily shorter than anyone else. Each dwarf has their own distinct personality which matches their name. PEEP - (AKA Little Bo Peep) (preferably Male, but can be Female) PEEP is the defense attorney for WOLF. PEEP believes in his/her client’s innocence and will fight for the justice Wolf deserves. If a male, PEEP should be very masculine, large, and comfortable wearing a bonnet. QUEENAN - (preferably Female, but could be Male) QUEENAN is the boss of STILTSKIN and MERM. S/He is anxious to have a conviction in this case. She’s wearing a purple outfit and is eating a caramel apple.
ROLES WITH A FEW LINES: These characters do have lines, but few and are only on for a short time. GRUMPY, BASHFUL, SNEEZY, SLEEPY, and DOPEY of the SEVEN DWARFS (Yes, those 7 Dwarfs.) (Female or Male) All DWARFS have at least one line. All SEVEN DWARFS wear basketball jerseys. They are the SEVEN DWARFS – though they aren’t necessarily shorter than anyone else. Each dwarf has their own distinct personality which matches their name. THREE BLIND MICE - (Male or Female) All three wear sunglasses. They are possible jurors for the trial. They may or may not be blind. SLEEPING BEAUTY - (Female) Drowsy possible juror princess. Rather unaware of her surroundings. THE MUFFIN MAN - (Male or Female) Possible juror. S/He has a couple of short lines and wears a tall chef’s hat.
PETER PETER PUMPKIN EATER - (Male) Possible juror with no lines, but “eating” a whole pumpkin. LITTLE RED RIDING HOOD - (Female) Wants to be on the jury. She wears her classic red outfit, carrying a basket, and wears an obviously fake mustache. CAT, FIDDLE, COW, LITTLE DOG, DISH, SPORK - (Female or Male) COW has a huge, unchanging smile plastered on her face. JUDGE F. GODMOTHER - (Female) The judge presiding over the trial with her magic wand gavel. BILLY GOAT BAILIFF - (preferably Male, but could be Female) Bailiff to the court. Swears in 3 PIGS. COURT REPORTER SPRAT - (Female or Male) Somewhat incompetent court reporter. The following roles are absolutely vital to the play, but say very little. They are seen at the beginning of each scene. They are, in some respects, narrators beginning the scenes, giving the location and time. Each of these characters need to have a strong speaking voice and the ability to be emotionless, yet authoritative in the delivery of their lines CHUH-CHUNK - Responsible for the sound effect most associated with the TV show Law & Order - Chuh-chunk. LOCATION - Responsible for telling us the location of every scene and remaining stoic. TIME - Responsible for telling us the time. Also has a momentary interaction with characters on stage. NUMEROUS ROLES WHO ARE IN THE BACKGROUND OF EACH SCENE - These are necessary roles, but do not have lines.